Signature Dish.

I have zero wife skills. Zero. I usually can manage not burning the house down (I did set a plate on fire cooking an egg in college), but I like to be supervised in the kitchen. For the safety of myself and those that will eventually consume the food I make.

I was invited to a potluck dinner last Thursday night for a few women in my department. I had all sorts of questions such as, Do I really have to go? What if I poison my boss? What will I talk about? What do I wear? Is this some initiation? Will we play light as a feather, stiff as a board? Why are only certain members of our department invited? Is this like a popular thing? Will I get to sit at the cool table on Friday? What if they don't like me?

The entire week I was freaking out but Thursday morning I had to face the music and begin my occupation of the kitchen. I have a few fail safe dishes that I know I can make and no one will die post consumption.

One area where I seem to excel is baking. I know this makes zero sense because baking is chemistry and I have math anxiety and baking is harder than cooking AND BLAH BLAH BLAH. I don't eat meat so for me to cook you a chicken dish means I will wear plastic gloves and a mask and probably burn it. Enjoy : )

My go-to items to bring to parties are red velvet cookies and raspberry squares. And let's be honest, I use a mix and have no fancy tweaks or inspiring garnishes to share with you.

Read box, mix ingredients, pray to the convection gods that I don't give anyone a gastrointestinal illness.

 Spinach and Strawberry salad seems to be a big hit anytime I make it. Plus I love it so this ensures I always have something to eat. I bring Annie's Balsamic Vinaigrette to pair with the delicious spinach.

I hate tomatoes, but I know many people like them, so I compromise and bring side dishes for add-ins to the salad. Buffalo Wing Cheddar is my b*tch lover and while I shouldn't eat it,

IT TASTES SO GOOD.

My womp womp hostess gift. I forgot to grab flowers when I was out running errands so I had to stop at a grocery store on my way, wrap the bouquet in ribbon in my car, and awkwardly hold them in my claw hand to take a glorious picture for you.

I am happy to report all parties are in good health and I received many compliments on my baked goods. Woo woo suck it, Martha.