At the age.

I am now at the age where my friends are starting to get married.

I am equal parts excited and freaked.

I am excited because I love a good wedding, any excuse to eat, dance, and hang with my best fraaands, but freaked because a- I don't want to be old and b- the institution of marriage really isn't my thing.

I got my first save the date (STD bahahaha sorry I have the maturity level of a 12 year old boy) in December and I thought it was such a cute idea.

A combo holiday/STD card.

I don't know if that is kosher in the wedding etiquette world but I like saving trees and I thought it was a wonderful way to get the word out while spreading some holiday cheer.

I am so excited to see one of my dearest friends from college get married. He will be 29 when he walks down the aisle and I couldn't be happier that he has found the one.

(side note: we have romantically encountered. not sure if his fiance knows. my life is super awkward).

A few weeks ago I received another STD from high school friends who are tying the knot in June.

Magnet. And she most definitely designed this. Not him.

He and I were eighth grade boyfriend and girlfriend, and sadly he broke up with me because he "would be too busy with work and lax." He was a shallow-end lifeguard. Anyway, he is my closest male friend and we have spent countless hours exchanging letters, AIM conversations, emails, and text messages. I am so proud of him for graduating from one of our nation's military academys and for his service to our country. His fiance and I were close friends in high school, had a falling out, and now she is still jealous of my strictly platonic relationship with him. My friends and I actually placed bets on whether I would be permitted to attend the wedding. While I might not be a huge fan of the entire thing, I am happy for him if he is happy.

My freshman year of college I was in a forced triple for the entire year. When I got my roommate assignment that summer, and talked to my two roommates, I quickly figured I would not like the former hockey player who was heavy into politics, but instead would be fast friends with the more girly, let's get our nails done and go shopping roommate. Funny, hockey player politico also decided she would not like the blonde cheerleader who had a weird accent on the phone. Flash forward to the end of freshman year and I could not stand nails/shopping roomie but absolutely loved politics roomie.

 My favorite freshman roommate is getting married down the Cape this summerfall and I am so excited to see her tie the knot on the beach.

The best part of her STD is the whole thing was DIY. She designed the card, had it printed, ordered the envelopes and stamped the front. I am obsessed. I luff anything nautical and I especially love that she made them herself.

I am a bridesmaid in a late September wedding and cannot wait to see what our mutual graphic designer friend has whipped up for the bride and groom.

Summer needs to get here right meow.

Weekend in review.

Friday:

Got sufficiently freaked out by my friends and family that meeting an old friend for drinks was a date.

No indication it was a date.

Apparently this is a real book.

I got home around 10:00...an hour before my father who was out with friends...I am so cool.

Saturday:

I bought a Groupon for Barre Fusion, which was described as a dance and pilates mix. Um no. It was free weights, some barre, and then the instructor not knowing anything about pilates attempting to tell us to do seal. Joe was probably rolling (like a ball) in his grave.

*I am a certified Power Pilates mat instructor so I cannot stand when something or someone advertises as having to do with pilates and it turns out to be a huge lie.

Immediately after Barre Fusion I headed to pick up two bagels to shove into my mouth while I watched PLK eat a veggie wrap. Ugh, skinny people. Always ruining my fun.

I received a text from not-date asking if I wanted to hang out again next week and travel down to his 'hood. I agreed, but still am unsure what his intention is. Maybe if his tongue ends up in my mouth next Friday night I will find out.

PLK and I had a desperate mani/pedi need and sushi craving so we took care of both and I was home by 10 pm. Which was amazing because I was still exhausted from my travels and multiple early morning wakeups.

Sunday:

I woke up at 7:00 am which was so nice because my alarm was set for 10:00 am. I ran a few errands and then came home to make my not-so-world-famous vegetable soup. Which I will now be exclusively eating for the next six days.

I still cannot believe it is March. Spring sucks, let's move on to Summer.

Disney Princess Half Marathon.

You totally need to read the title of this post in Honey Boo Boo Child's "I want some money" voice. It's the only way it works.

Figment obviously needed purple nails.

Last Friday I flew down to Florida in an exceptionally cranky mood. Friday was the 4th anniversary of my ex's accident, plus Saturday would have been 11 years together, had we actually formally stayed together and didn't play the silly games we still engage in. Anyway, 11 years is a long time for someone to have your heart and be involved in your life.

So I was a miserable wench.

And then my first flight got delayed. And then I almost puked the turbulence was so bad. And I never get motion sickness and don't mind flying at all. But this was horrendous. It never stopped the entire hour we were in the air. So then I get to BWI (holler my old jumpoff...I used to fly home from school and had to fly down to BWI and then back up to NY so I am well versed in the art of this particular aeropuerto).

Oh sweet my next flight is delayed. I finally get to the house of mouse and am waiting for my magical express to bring me to the resort...and I get some ghetro non-Disney bus. RUDE.

I'm furiously texting my mother (who had gone to Ft. Myers earlier in the week and arrived in Orlando that morning) to see if she will run over to Downtown Disney and get my Earl of Sangwich veggie sangie for me because I won't have enough time...this was a devastating fat girl problem that I needed to resolve.

I finally get to my resort, check in, get to the room, oh yeah my phone died so I don't even know if my mother got my message regarding the urgent need for a sangie and SOFT chocolate chip cookie, and luckily she shows up shortly after.

I shove the sang-wich into my mouth and intermittently complain about the flight.

It does wonders for your digestive system when you eat at midnight and then proceed immediately to bed.

Saturday I woke up nice and early, thanks internal clock, and got ready to head over to the expo to pick up my packet and check out the vendors.

WOOF CITY.

 Every single adult without body awareness happened to be at that expo.

First of all, the packet pick up should have been a breeze. Have your signed waiver and ID out, just as the sign said. Oh wait, you mean I need to have my waiver SIGNED and my ID OUT? That is so strange so I will just wait until I get up to the volunteers and dick around in my wallet for 25 minutes. Pay no mind to the 80+ people behind me in line. My blood sugar was getting low and I was getting exceptionally snippy. I informed my mother I needed to eat asap and she replied "yes, I know."

Move onto the actual expo/vendor section...good in theory, poor in design.

 I'm sorry, this crowded space is probably not the best place for your child to log roll around. Also not a good spot for them to play tag, scream, cry, or generally be in the vicinity of.

Most of the adults also fit into that category. It really is not that difficult to understand where your body is in space. Also not difficult to not stop in the middle of a walkway, wander aimlessly in a haphazard pattern, or forget that you are in fact an adult, and in public.

I did a quick lap of the expo and peaced. I was not in the mood.

We took the transportation back to the resort, I ran to get food, and then got on a bus to EPCOT for lunch. Upon entering the park I couldn't help but calm down and be happy...I don't care how old you are, being in Disney World is an instant mood-elevator.

We headed to Test Track and walked right on by doing single rider...and then it was time for me to eat again.

I picked China for lunch because I've had their quick service veggies and rice and knew it was something I could eat without feeling sick. The sun came out and it was blazing hot but I still made my mother sit in the sun and eat.

Post delicious lunch we headed to MGM (sorry it will always be MGM to me), where we had a few hours to kill before our early dinner reservation at Mama Melrose's.

Obviously the Great Movie Ride was our first stop...the best part might have been the man in our row who ANSWERED his phone on the ride and then proceeded to carry on a CONVERSATION while the ride was continuing.

We did the Muppet's, I ate a frozen banana, and then we discovered a new Toy Story interactive ride. You are in a moving ride with a laser-ish device for each rider, and the ride brings you to digital fair games (kind of similar to the Buzz Lightyear ride in MK, but you are not in outer space).



As we were waiting for the ride I spotted this on the ceiling...



 The ride was a blast and if the wait time was shorter, we would have kept going on.



Dominated my mother, however my accuracy leaves something to be desired.

After some salad and gnocchi I said goodnight to my mother and went back to the resort to prep and hopefully sleep before the race.

I obviously had to lay everything out before I could even think about getting into bed.

So many ting tings.

At last I climbed into bed at 8:00 pm with my alarm set for 2:45 a.m.

WOOF.

I was correct.

Even though my friends and family tried to tell me otherwise, I knew tonight's outing was not a date. And I was correct. We chatted, he got to watch me shovel lettuce into my fache, and I enjoyed a 10 ounce baby beer. It is super fun and awkward to eat a salad when the other party at your table isn't eating. I'm eating a salad and I don't even look like the rexi one. That is an ultimate #whitegirlproblem (yea I used a hashtag, what of it?) We ended the night just as we do every time we hangout, with a hug and a kiss on the cheek.

Suck on that one friends and family.

Thank goodness because I don't want to lose another male zone to the awkward Iwanttobeonyouzone. (I'm sorry that people are so jealous of me. But I can't help it that I'm popular.)

Long live the friend zone.

AHHHHHH #WGP

I think I have a date tonight. But I don't know...and he follows me on twitter so I can't complain on that forum.

AHHHHH I am white girl problem-ing everywhere.

Wear your helmet.

March is Brain Injury Awareness Month, and in honor of my sister who is living with a TBI, let's always remember, safety first, wear your helmet, and patience and tolerance go a long way!

Wear your helmet!

"Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle."- Plato

I just ordered her a shirt in honor of her special month:

"No, I'm not drunk. I have a brain injury. (But thanks for asking!)" from zazzle.com

And this is why I'll never amount to anything

So Sunday morning I ran my first half marathon. My goal was to finish. I would have liked to finish in under three hours, and ended up crossing at 3:01:09 according to the race time. My calculations have me finishing around 2:55 but I'm not that concerned. I stopped three times to use the bathroom (my bladder is the size of a raisin) and I typically run around a 11-12 minute mile. My average pace was 13:30.

I didn't train.

 In October I ran a 10k. Since October, the longest I ran was 3 miles. The weeks leading up to the race, I barely ran 3 miles a week. I am the world's largest procrastinator.

 I sometimes wish that I would get bit on the rear end by my procrastination, just so I would learn my lesson.

In college I would write papers the night, or even the morning before they were due. My junior year I wrote a 10 page paper in 2 hours sitting outside in the sun chatting with friends and drinking, and got an A. I work well under pressure even though I know I should plan ahead. I get really angry at myself; but when you get As on papers and are still able to finish a half marathon, it is hard to be that upset.

I ran the first 8 miles, power walking through water stations.

My longest distance prior was 6.2.

PLK is my only homegirl friend who also runs. She had been reminding me I needed to train, and she would ask how I was doing. I waited until after I finished to tell her about my lack of training because I knew she would scold me. Which she did. But with good reason.

A quick peek at my race attire:

3:00 am. Girlfriend was still asleep.

Yes, that is the same tutu. 1989. Vintage, betch.